Who deserves who?
So the question goes why is it the good ones always find themselves bad partners? Or maybe you’ve heard someone say, “You know I would never find a good man/woman like that,” as they admire a couple that appears to be perfect.
Well, I'm asking…. Like what exactly? Someone to spoil you rotten and bow to your every need as though rotten smells or looks good, to begin with. Now don’t get me wrong some rotten things makes perfect manure and nourish our world with food but hey that’s not the case here.
Good ones don’t find bad ones! They attract them like a magnet. No one is bad and certainly, no one is good. Life is what you make it and if negative decisions are your thing then don’t complain when you reap the consequences of your deeds. Yes, we choose to do “good” by those we care for the most or have some special connection to, but no one owes you anything really. If you want to be positive and helpful, without setting boundaries, just to satisfy the part of you that wants to be a healthy being, don’t expect the world to return the favor and especially not those “loved” ones. It is good to be good, but without boundaries, people will always abuse your kindness, especially if you are allowing them to.
Again don’t get me wrong. Everybody deserves to feel loved, that’s why Christ died for us. Everybody wants to be happy and live their best life, but that life comes when you create it. Ever heard that next saying? Hurt people hurt people! Well, it's true and not because we set out for revenge. Nope! It’s because mental health is real, depression is real and the healing process takes time.
If you don’t take the time to understand the importance of mental health and depression and the MANY DIFFERENT ways it can be triggered and affect you, then, you will be stuck in space for a long time. If you never allow yourself to identify your “errors and mistakes” also known as unhealthy behavioral patterns, you will never be able to point them out when they reoccur over and over and over and over and over, and well you get the point, over again. Healing will seem like a task that cannot be accomplished.
If you can’t identify the issue/problem, you won’t even know there is a problem to begin with. If you don’t know there’s an issue/problem well you certainly won’t be able to fix it. How can a plumber fix a leak if he can’t see it? Sometimes, tiny leaks can cause huge problems, so finding the leak is vital to avoid greater impact later on.
My advice to you is to avoid falling into stereotypical behavior. Take accountability for your actions, your thoughts, the decisions YOU make, and stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. Break the cycle YOU created by following “the world”. Maybe it’s your circle you follow, seeking some desirable feeling to be wanted, loved, cared about, etc. Seek help from a professional, even if you feel some kind of fear to face your truths, follow your gut…. That fear usually means growth is happening. Face it, cry, scream, vent, just get it out and take the necessary steps to move forward…. Move forward to the happier life you know you can create for yourself.
Don’t allow yourself to feel responsible for others' emotions and certainly not their happiness. Learn to love yourself first. After all, God knows all things and He did say love your neighbor like yourself. That suggests you love yourself first so you will know how to love others.
Respect yourself, love yourself, set healthy boundaries, and be the attraction you want to attract.
Keep Striving,
P.P.A
